The big picture
Amnon, a son of King David, desires his half-sister Tamar. She shares a mother with Absalom, another son of David. Jonadab, their cousin, helps him arrange to be alone with her. Tamar is raped and then forced out of Amnon's house. Absalom takes her in, but his silence hides hatred for Amnon. Two years later, he orders his brother killed at a feast and flees. David, their father, grieves. The harm done within his family brings lasting desolation, revenge and separation.
In this chapter
- Jonadab Helps Amnon Set a Trap 2 Samuel 13:1-7
Amnon becomes ill with desire for Tamar, who is a virgin.
- Tamar Refuses and Amnon Uses Force 2 Samuel 13:8-14
Tamar prepares cakes where Amnon can see her, but he refuses to eat.
- Amnon Throws Tamar Out 2 Samuel 13:15-19
Amnon's desire turns into fierce hatred, and he orders Tamar to leave.
- Tamar Remains Desolate with Absalom 2 Samuel 13:20-22
Absalom understands what Amnon has done and tells Tamar to keep quiet.
- A Feast Becomes an Ambush 2 Samuel 13:23-29
Two full years pass before Absalom invites the king's sons to a sheep-shearing feast.
- A False Report Deepens David’s Grief 2 Samuel 13:30-39
David first hears that all his sons have been killed.
Central truth
Amnon's rape of Tamar brings shame and grief that David's anger does not repair, while Absalom plans a deadly revenge.
Scripture beside the summary
2 Samuel · King James Version · 392 Samuel 13:1-7
Jonadab Helps Amnon Set a Trap
Amnon becomes ill with desire for Tamar, who is a virgin. His cousin Jonadab notices his state and asks why he is wasting away. When Amnon explains, Jonadab suggests pretending to be sick. He should ask David to send Tamar to prepare food beside his bed. Amnon follows the plan, and David sends her to his house. A request that appears to be about care creates private access to her. Tamar has not chosen the purpose hidden behind her father's order.
In everyday life
The safeguarding trainer reviews messages used to arrange a private meeting with a vulnerable client. She points out how an innocent request for help hides the organiser's intent. Staff had passed it on without knowing the plan. The exercise stops at recognising the setup. Amnon's deception leads to the rape of his half-sister.
Notice
2 Samuel 13:5 Jonadab supplies the plan to feign sickness and ask for Tamar's care. The later assault begins with a deliberate arrangement, not an unexpected meeting.
2 Samuel 13:1-7
King James Version1And it came to pass after this, that Absalom the son of David had a fair sister, whose name was Tamar; and Amnon the son of David loved her.
2And Amnon was so vexed, that he fell sick for his sister Tamar; for she was a virgin; and Amnon thought it hard for him to do any thing to her.
3But Amnon had a friend, whose name was Jonadab, the son of Shimeah David’s brother: and Jonadab was a very subtil man.
4And he said unto him, Why art thou, being the king’s son, lean from day to day? wilt thou not tell me? And Amnon said unto him, I love Tamar, my brother Absalom’s sister.
5And Jonadab said unto him, Lay thee down on thy bed, and make thyself sick: and when thy father cometh to see thee, say unto him, I pray thee, let my sister Tamar come, and give me meat, and dress the meat in my sight, that I may see it, and eat it at her hand.
6So Amnon lay down, and made himself sick: and when the king was come to see him, Amnon said unto the king, I pray thee, let Tamar my sister come, and make me a couple of cakes in my sight, that I may eat at her hand.
7Then David sent home to Tamar, saying, Go now to thy brother Amnon’s house, and dress him meat.
2 Samuel 13:8-14
Tamar Refuses and Amnon Uses Force
Tamar prepares cakes where Amnon can see her, but he refuses to eat. He sends everyone else out and asks her to bring food into his room. There he grabs her and demands sex. She says no, names the act as wrong, and pleads with him to speak to the king. Amnon ignores her voice. Because he is stronger, he forces her and rapes her. Her words make her refusal clear. His desire does not make this a shared or willing act.
In everyday life
A victim advocate listens without interrupting as a survivor describes saying no and being ignored. She writes down the refusal and keeps responsibility with the person who used force. She does not turn the account into a romance. Tamar's assault occurs within a royal family, where her brother uses his strength against her.
Notice
2 Samuel 13:14 Amnon does not listen to Tamar and overpowers her. The account connects the rape to his force and refusal to hear, not to any consent.
2 Samuel 13:8-14
King James Version8So Tamar went to her brother Amnon’s house; and he was laid down. And she took flour, and kneaded it, and made cakes in his sight, and did bake the cakes.
9And she took a pan, and poured them out before him; but he refused to eat. And Amnon said, Have out all men from me. And they went out every man from him.
10And Amnon said unto Tamar, Bring the meat into the chamber, that I may eat of thine hand. And Tamar took the cakes which she had made, and brought them into the chamber to Amnon her brother.
11And when she had brought them unto him to eat, he took hold of her, and said unto her, Come lie with me, my sister.
12And she answered him, Nay, my brother, do not force me; for no such thing ought to be done in Israel: do not thou this folly.
13And I, whither shall I cause my shame to go? and as for thee, thou shalt be as one of the fools in Israel. Now therefore, I pray thee, speak unto the king; for he will not withhold me from thee.
14Howbeit he would not hearken unto her voice: but, being stronger than she, forced her, and lay with her.
2 Samuel 13:15-19
Amnon Throws Tamar Out
Amnon's desire turns into fierce hatred, and he orders Tamar to leave. She protests that sending her away adds another wrong to what he has done. Again he refuses to listen. He tells a servant to put her outside and bolt the door. Tamar tears the special robe worn by the king's unmarried daughters. She puts ashes on her head and goes away crying. The locked door leaves her carrying public grief while the man who harmed her shuts her out.
In everyday life
The crisis receptionist opens a quiet room for a woman turned away after reporting harm. She offers a seat and lets the woman choose when to speak. A closed door elsewhere has deepened the distress she brings. Care begins by refusing that rejection. Tamar is expelled by the very brother who raped her.
Notice
2 Samuel 13:17 Amnon orders the door bolted after Tamar is put out. The physical barrier gives a final form to his refusal to hear her protest.
2 Samuel 13:15-19
King James Version15Then Amnon hated her exceedingly; so that the hatred wherewith he hated her was greater than the love wherewith he had loved her. And Amnon said unto her, Arise, be gone.
16And she said unto him, There is no cause: this evil in sending me away is greater than the other that thou didst unto me. But he would not hearken unto her.
17Then he called his servant that ministered unto him, and said, Put now this woman out from me, and bolt the door after her.
18And she had a garment of divers colours upon her: for with such robes were the king’s daughters that were virgins apparelled. Then his servant brought her out, and bolted the door after her.
19And Tamar put ashes on her head, and rent her garment of divers colours that was on her, and laid her hand on her head, and went on crying.
2 Samuel 13:20-22
Tamar Remains Desolate with Absalom
Absalom understands what Amnon has done and tells Tamar to keep quiet. He points to the family bond rather than confronting Amnon openly. Tamar remains desolate in Absalom's house. David hears what happened and is very angry, but no further action by him is reported here. Absalom says nothing to Amnon, good or bad, because he hates him for the rape. The silence around the brothers does not mean peace. Tamar's distress remains while anger grows inside the family.
In everyday life
A counsellor hears relatives say that a complaint must stay quiet for the family's sake. She asks what support the harmed person is actually receiving. Anger expressed in private has not brought protection or repair. The silence leaves distress in place. Absalom's hidden hatred will lead to murder within David's royal household.
Notice
2 Samuel 13:20 Tamar is described as desolate while living in Absalom's home. Shelter and family silence do not amount to recovery from what was done to her.
2 Samuel 13:20-22
King James Version20And Absalom her brother said unto her, Hath Amnon thy brother been with thee? but hold now thy peace, my sister: he is thy brother; regard not this thing. So Tamar remained desolate in her brother Absalom’s house.
21But when king David heard of all these things, he was very wroth.
22And Absalom spake unto his brother Amnon neither good nor bad: for Absalom hated Amnon, because he had forced his sister Tamar.
2 Samuel 13:23-29
A Feast Becomes an Ambush
Two full years pass before Absalom invites the king's sons to a sheep-shearing feast. David declines to attend, but Absalom presses him to let Amnon come. He then orders his servants to watch until Amnon is cheerful with wine. At his command, they must kill him without fear. The servants obey, and the other princes flee on their mules. The gathering has been arranged for revenge. Absalom's long silence ends in a planned killing carried out by men under his authority.
In everyday life
An event security officer discovers that a host has used a reunion to settle an old dispute. Guest lists and drink orders now read like parts of a plan. She preserves them for those investigating the harm. A friendly invitation has concealed hostility. Absalom deliberately orders his brother killed as revenge for Tamar's rape.
Notice
2 Samuel 13:28 Absalom tells his servants to act on his command and not be afraid. He uses his authority to make others carry out the killing.
2 Samuel 13:23-29
King James Version23And it came to pass after two full years, that Absalom had sheepshearers in Baal-hazor, which is beside Ephraim: and Absalom invited all the king’s sons.
24And Absalom came to the king, and said, Behold now, thy servant hath sheepshearers; let the king, I beseech thee, and his servants go with thy servant.
25And the king said to Absalom, Nay, my son, let us not all now go, lest we be chargeable unto thee. And he pressed him: howbeit he would not go, but blessed him.
26Then said Absalom, If not, I pray thee, let my brother Amnon go with us. And the king said unto him, Why should he go with thee?
27But Absalom pressed him, that he let Amnon and all the king’s sons go with him.
28Now Absalom had commanded his servants, saying, Mark ye now when Amnon’s heart is merry with wine, and when I say unto you, Smite Amnon; then kill him, fear not: have not I commanded you? be courageous, and be valiant.
29And the servants of Absalom did unto Amnon as Absalom had commanded. Then all the king’s sons arose, and every man gat him up upon his mule, and fled.
2 Samuel 13:30-39
A False Report Deepens David’s Grief
David first hears that all his sons have been killed. He tears his clothes and lies on the ground. Jonadab corrects the report: only Amnon is dead, and Absalom planned this because of Tamar. The other princes arrive weeping, confirming that they live. Absalom flees to Talmai, king of Geshur, and stays there three years. David mourns Amnon and later longs for Absalom. One son's death and another's absence leave the king grieving across the divide that revenge has created.
In everyday life
A news desk editor receives a report that every member of a family has died. She waits for names, checks a second source, and corrects the figure when survivors arrive. The smaller toll still means a real death. David receives such a correction amid a son's murder and another son's flight from the kingdom.
Notice
2 Samuel 13:32 Jonadab corrects the claim that every prince has died. He also identifies the killing as a plan tied to the earlier harm done to Tamar.
2 Samuel 13:30-39
King James Version30And it came to pass, while they were in the way, that tidings came to David, saying, Absalom hath slain all the king’s sons, and there is not one of them left.
31Then the king arose, and tare his garments, and lay on the earth; and all his servants stood by with their clothes rent.
32And Jonadab, the son of Shimeah David’s brother, answered and said, Let not my lord suppose that they have slain all the young men the king’s sons; for Amnon only is dead: for by the appointment of Absalom this hath been determined from the day that he forced his sister Tamar.
33Now therefore let not my lord the king take the thing to his heart, to think that all the king’s sons are dead: for Amnon only is dead.
34But Absalom fled. And the young man that kept the watch lifted up his eyes, and looked, and, behold, there came much people by the way of the hill side behind him.
35And Jonadab said unto the king, Behold, the king’s sons come: as thy servant said, so it is.
36And it came to pass, as soon as he had made an end of speaking, that, behold, the king’s sons came, and lifted up their voice and wept: and the king also and all his servants wept very sore.
37But Absalom fled, and went to Talmai, the son of Ammihud, king of Geshur. And David mourned for his son every day.
38So Absalom fled, and went to Geshur, and was there three years.
39And the soul of king David longed to go forth unto Absalom: for he was comforted concerning Amnon, seeing he was dead.
Details worth noticing
The opening image
2 Samuel 13:1 begins with “And it came to pass after this, that Absalom the son of David had a fair sister, whose name was Tamar; and Amnon the son of David loved her.”
Where the chapter turns
2 Samuel 13:20 forms a natural hinge: “And Absalom her brother said unto her, Hath Amnon thy brother been with thee? but hold now thy peace, my sister: he is thy brother; regard not this thing…”
The final note
2 Samuel 13:39 leaves the reader with “And the soul of king David longed to go forth unto Absalom: for he was comforted concerning Amnon, seeing he was dead.”
A word trail through the chapter
The words Amnon, Absalom, king, brother, Tamar, king’s help reveal the chapter’s repeated concerns.
KJV words made clear
- behold
- look, or pay close attention
- unto
- to
- thee
- you
- thou
- you
- thy
- your
Music and video connected to the passage
Related media appears when its Scripture reference overlaps this study. Music and video can illuminate a theme while the biblical text remains the foundation.
